Book Review: It’s Not Okay


Sadly there is no new Bachelorette on tonight due to the NBA Finals (who cares about basketball anyway….Go Warriors!). So instead of a recap of JoJo’s ventures, I have a book review from a past Bachelorette, Andi Dorfman.

Andi first joined Bachelor Nation by contending for Juan Pablo’s heart. She was the spunky southern lawyer and the only brunette with half a chance, Juan Pablo sure had a thing for blondes. She made it to the Fantasy Suite date, and was very unimpressed with her alone time with the ex-soccer player. She called him out for his ego and lack of interest in her. She dumped him and attacked his annoying motto “It’s okay.” 

Being the first contestant to effectively dump the lead and blame it on them, Andi won America’s heart and was dubbed the next Bachelorette. Her season introduced us to Nick Viall, the only contestant to finish 2nd on two seasons of The Bachelorette. And of course farmer Chris. But Andi ultimately picked former baseball player Josh Murray. They seemed ridiculously happy but broke off their engagement after 9 months. This book dives into their love story and the demise of their relationship as well as a dose of self-help breakup advice.

I bought this book as a guilty pleasure read, without high expectations. Of course I wanted the dirt on Andi’s season and the guys involved. Though most Bachelor and Bachelorette couples do break up, most keep the details pretty private, other than the classic “we realized we wanted different things after the show”. And Andi was a very well received lead, and trustworthy unlike other authors of memoirs from the show (I.e- Courtney Robertson). 

Andi did deliver on the dirt and the details. From her hilarious confessions from the Fantasy Suite with Juan Pablo to what really happened with her breakup. She doesn’t name her suitors, but refers to them by number. It’s not hard to figure out who she is talking about but it is pretty cool that she left their names out of her proverbial “mouth”. 

She goes quite easy on the show. She obviously wants to maintain her relationship with ABC so she is very kind about the show and process. If you’re looking for an “UnReal”-esque memoir, this isn’t it. This focuses more on the men themselves, mostly Josh aka Number 26.

I appreciated her honest look into a toxic relationship, she doesn’t hold back. You see the good, bad and ugly of their short-lived engagement. Let’s just say that Josh comes off much less than a prince in this book. I’m sure he has a different side to many of these events but Andi’s version is quite believable.

But the other “half” to this book is a self-help advice on breakups. It’s endearing at times but it quickly becomes redundant and annoying. Everyone knows the tears, candy eating, wine drinking side of a breakup. Along with the burning his stuff party you have to have. This is just filler in between the real life details which I feel like are much more interesting and compelling. 

If you’re looking for a juicy read by the pool and are a Bachelor fanatic then this is a good summer book. It probably won’t get you through a breakup (any more than a bottle of Pinot and a Pint of Ben and Jerrys) but it serves it’s purpose.

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